When I was young and foolish, I never knew my heart

This is first line of a song I wrote, which I mention further on in this article
I was brought up as a Christian, I was told by my mother I went Sunday school even though I don’t remember that, but I do remember school ensembles
School in those days was where the Holy Bible was read aloud by the headmaster, I’m unsure how many others boys listen, but I found the stories fascinating and believable
This may have been due to my Sunday school lessons, I guess some of those must have stuck in my memory more than I thought
Later on in my youth, I also heard other stories about fictional people, who had become legends and touched my impressionable mind so they became my heroes
Sometimes later around 1960’s, I acquired an interest in science fiction, and bought many “strange tales of the unexpected” comics
It would not be until many years later in my young adult life, I would become curious enough to start reading the Holy Bible and much later on after doing a scripture Bible study that I decide to get baptised
I got to a point in my studying the “word” I could find passages for all kinds of situations without effort, but sadly my enthusiasm for reading and studying the Bible, lost its appeal or I got too distracted
Perhaps as a result, even after a short while away from studying the Bible, I found even though I tried I no longer had that ability of finding suitable passages
My one saving grace were the Hymns I had learnt from school days, even though I really did not appreciate their power, which I will explain more about later on
Shamefully I grew further away from any form of worship or study, not even allowing myself time to pray and more importantly listening for answers
This was a very dark time in my life, one that led me to experiment with things best left alone, that only gave fleeting pleasure, then emptiness inside
I found that giving into self-indulgences only dragged me further down into a dark depressive lonely place, void of hope love or joy
I’m unsure how long this period of time lasted, in my desperation I used a song I wrote as a prayer but that was more of a plea for help
Our heavenly father graciously listened and forgave and lifted me up
Even though I still allow myself to entertain strange thoughts and visit Agnostic discussion television programs that they recorded and uploaded to YouTube videos, which plant seeds of doubt in my mind, as they demand that callers provide proof that the Bible is true and what proof do we Christians have the there is a heavenly god
My response would now be, I have no real proof, except my own experiences, for there have been many people in the past who have wrote songs of praise and Hymns
When sung they lift up our flagging spirits, our hopes and fill us with a love so deep and prefect that it is proof enough for us believers, and no disbeliever or anyone else can rob us of this precious gift

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